Afraid of Negotiating?
Written by Oanh Han, WIN Staff
The statistics show that many women dread to negotiate. In honor of the “spookiest” night of the year, we dedicated this week’s WIN article to decoding or “unmasking” if you will, the three top fears that you may have around negotiation and then we give you three tips for what you can do to fight those ghouls off!
Fear #1: Incompetence or Lack of skills
22% of women polled (Salary.com) didn’t ask for a raise because they felt they lacked the skills needed to negotiate.
Women report a greater lack of confidence, don’t feel they have adequate negotiation skills
Unmask the fear with: Negotiation skills training.
Well you know we have the solution to this one — skills training! And lucky for you we have it in spades. Join us at WIN Summit 2020 on December 8th to arm yourself with some hard and fast negotiation skills or book a WIN coach for a one on one and fast track yourself to negotiation success! [ADD LINKS]
Fear #2: Seeming Inappropriate or Demanding
Too often women do not push for the topic of salary re-evaluations and raises because they believe they would come off as inappropriate. This kind of thought process is seen especially among professionals who have not been in the field for long enough to understand their value. Instead, they choose to shy away from the topic they believe may cost them their job.
This reservation can have a domino effect, as it holds you back on a series of possible gains that might go to your colleague simply because he or she asked
Unmask the fear with: Owning your value and your assertive voice.
Men have no problem staking their claim and advocating for their position. If you knew that your male colleague down the hall did the same thing and got his needs met, would that open you up to doing so too? Then acknowledge that they are and entitle yourself to do so too. Arming yourself with facts, statistics, and market comparisons will help you confidently and persuasively make your case so do your homework and then throw that baggage aside. At the end of the day, your counterparties are not your friends or your family - what matters is that they respect you and the first step to that is respecting yourself and your worth.
Fear #3: Losing Your Job/ Getting Rejected
Many believe that by opening up the possibly controversial doors to salary negotiations, they could potentially lose the job offer or, in the case of existing employees, get fired.
32% of people (salary.com) said they were too worried about losing the job offer if they tried to negotiate.
Most women do not ask for more salary or benefits because they fear they will be refused. In addition, they fear they will lose the job already offered. Women are more eager to accept the offer on the table because they do not want to lose the opportunity.
Unmask the fear with: Getting comfortable with ‘no’.
The worst thing that can happen if you ask is that you get a no. This discomfort around hearing the no, or getting rejected, holds women back from asking. Reframe your ability to negotiate through seeing it from the eyes of the potential employer - they want to hire people who know how to advocate for themselves because those types of people will likely translate into being better advocates for their companies as well. Rest confident that there are many good reasons that this company has made you (and not a myriad of other candidates) the offer and then make your ask!
Negotiating doesn’t have to be scary. Just like how Halloween terrors go away, your fears about claiming your value and negotiating what you’re worth will fade too. Beneath the masks of lack of skills, combating bias, or getting rejected, is simply lack of confidence. Luckily, by first identifying your fears and then making a plan to overcome them, you’re on your way to understanding how to be a better negotiator in the future.
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